A Note From Your Father
My son,
I am writing these principles so that, whatever life throws at us, you will never be in doubt about what I believe, what I pray for you, and how I expect you to walk as a man.
These are not slogans. They are anchors for when life feels confusing, unfair or overwhelming.
1. Start With God, Not With Yourself
The world will tell you to "follow your heart."
Your heart is important - but it is not your God.
Begin with:
- Who God is
- What He has said
- What He calls good and evil
When you start with God, you gain a fixed reference point in a shifting world.
2. Guard Your Integrity at All Costs
There are things you can lose and recover: money, deals, opportunities.
There are things you cannot easily recover: trust, honour, credibility.
- Say what you mean.
- Do what you said you would do.
- If you fail, own it quickly and repair it fully.
I would rather see you honest and struggling than successful and crooked.
3. Honour Your Name and Your Word
Your name is not a logo. It is a reputation built over years.
- Do not sign what you do not intend to honour.
- Do not promise what you know you cannot deliver.
- Do not use people as stepping stones.
When people hear your name, let them think: "I can trust this man."
4. Work Hard, Work Smart, Rest Well
Laziness will quietly erode your potential.
Workaholism will quietly erode your soul.
- Learn to work hard - with focus, discipline and excellence.
- Learn to work smart - prioritise, think, plan.
- Learn to rest well - sleep, take breaks, enjoy beauty and silence.
You are not a machine. You are a man created for purpose, not just output.
5. Take Responsibility, Do Not Play the Victim
Life will not always be fair. People will not always be kind. Systems will not always be just.
Still:
- Own your choices.
- Own your reactions.
- Own your next step.
You may not be responsible for what happened to you, but you are responsible for what happens next.
6. Choose Your Friends Carefully
The people you walk with will shape:
- Your habits
- Your decisions
- Your vision of what is "normal"
Walk with men who:
- Tell you the truth
- Challenge you when you drift
- Celebrate your growth without envy
Do not confuse attention with loyalty.
7. Honour Women, Protect the Vulnerable
How you treat women says a lot about your character.
- Never use charm to manipulate.
- Never use strength to intimidate.
- Never treat anyone as disposable.
Honour begins with how you speak, look and think.
Treat every person as someone made in the image of God.
8. Learn to Handle Money Wisely
Money is a tool, not a master.
- Live below your means.
- Avoid unnecessary debt.
- Give generously and quietly.
- Save and invest with patience, not greed.
If you master your appetites, you will not be easily mastered by money.
9. Tell the Truth About Your Pain
Strong men are not those who never cry or never struggle.
Strong men are those who refuse to hide in silence and self-destruction.
When you are overwhelmed:
- Speak to God honestly.
- Speak to someone you trust deeply.
- Ask for help before you collapse.
You never lose dignity by asking for wise help. You lose dignity by pretending until everything breaks.
10. Build for Legacy, Not Just for Today
Life is short. Eternity is long. People are watching even when you think they are not.
Ask yourself often:
- "What am I building that will outlive me?"
- "What kind of story will my life tell about God, about manhood, about fatherhood?"
I want you to live in such a way that your children and their children can thank God for the decisions you made.
Final Word
My son,
You will make mistakes. So did I. So will every man you admire.
What matters is that you keep returning to truth, to God, and to who you are called to be.
Whatever happens:
You are my son. I love you. I want you to stand, to build, and to walk without fear.
Your father.